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TimeOut

Blonde's Year in Review

 

January: Took new scarf back to store because it was too tight

 

February: Fired from pharmacy job for failing to print labels ... Helllloooo!!! ... Bottles won't fit into printer!!!

 

March: Got really excited ... finished jigsaw puzzle in 6 months ... box said "2-4 years!"

 

April: Trapped on escalator for hours ... power went out

 

May: Tried to make Kool-Aid ... wrong instructions ... 8 cups of water won't fit into those little packets

 

June: Tried to go water skiing ... couldn't find a lake with a slope

 

July: Lost breast stroke swimming competition ... learned later the other swimmers cheated ... they used their arms

 

August: Got locked out of my car in rain storm ... car swamped because soft-top was open

 

September: The capital of California is "C" ... isn't it?

 

October: Hate M&M's ... they are so hard to peel

 

November: baked turkey for 4 1/2 days ... instructions said 1 hour per pound and I weigh 108

 

December: Couldn't call 911 ... "duh" ... there's no "eleven" button on the stupid phone!

 

Jeeez ... What a year

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34 Comments view entire thread 

PuristSPro TimeOut forum Friday "OPEN MIKE NIGHT"!

 
By: DRMW : November 20th, 2009-00:01
Hello all, It's Friday so let's start the weekend with something funny. A friend sent this to me yesterday and she thought it was hilarious: Ladies, Read Only The First Part – Men, The Rest A Woman was out golfing one day when she hit the ball into the wo... 

LOL...

 
By: ATM : November 20th, 2009-09:49
Thanks DRMW. I enjoy reading this along with my chocolate muffin this morning...  

It proves...

 
By: chaser579 : November 20th, 2009-10:04
It proves that what can be designed, tested, and produced in the United States (or Britain or Europe, I imagine) versus "offshore" manufacturing, will always be better and exceed the maximum requirements.

If...

 
By: ThomasM : November 20th, 2009-11:32
If pro is the opposite of con, what is the opposite of progress? .. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . CON-gress.

LOL! clever!

 
By: ThomasM : November 20th, 2009-11:34
reminds me of this one (I recently used it to end a post on HoMe; sorry to repeat) If a man say's something in the forest, and there are no women around to hear it, Is he still wrong? TM

A blonde was speeding down the freeway...

 
By: ED209 : November 20th, 2009-19:03
A highway patrol officer pulled up alongside a speeding car on the freeway. As the officer peered through the driver's window, he was astounded to find that the blonde behind the wheel was knitting. The trooper cranked down his window and yelled to the dr... 

oh, SNAAP!

 
By: ThomasM : November 20th, 2009-22:16
You are SO bad, Ed! How many blonds in your office? ;-)

In keeping with the blonde joke theme

 
By: cfdfire : November 22nd, 2009-03:48
A blond texts her friend and says, "What does IDK mean?" Her friend says, "I don't know." The blond says "Wow, nobody does!"

Let’s even the blond score a bit …

 
By: AndrewD : November 22nd, 2009-16:33
An Irishman, a Mexican and a Blonde Guy were doing construction work on scaffolding on the 20th floor of a building. They were eating lunch and the Irishman said, 'Corned beef and cabbage! If I get corned beef and cabbage one more time for lunch, I'm goin... 

Blonde's Year in Review

 
By: AndrewD : November 22nd, 2009-17:13
January: Took new scarf back to store because it was too tight February: Fired from pharmacy job for failing to print labels ... Helllloooo!!! ... Bottles won't fit into printer!!! March: Got really excited ... finished jigsaw puzzle in 6 months ... box s...